This was a devotional entry I wrote eight years ago for Real Time: Time to Get Real with God (Devotions for Filipino Youth). Eight years and it's only now I got a driver's license, and beginning to brave the streets of Quezon City. But thankfully, I'm not much of the control-freak that I was back then. Now, about those driving escapades... ;p
I know, Lord, that we humans are not in control of our own lives.
Nothing is more exhilarating for a new driver like me than getting behind the wheel. The sense of control is just overwhelming. It amazes me how simply turning the steering wheel and stepping on a pedal can wield a huge, heavy metal casing called a car according to the whims of the driver. I have yet to get a license. Until then, my driving escapades are on hold.
My enthusiasm about driving says a lot about me. I admit I’m a control freak. I thrive in an orderly and predictable environment. Having a sense of control gives me power. Pull me out of my controlled world, and I basically fall apart.
I remember the times when this happened to me. In my third year of college, I almost broke down and cried at the thought of flunking one of my major subjects. When Daddy suddenly fell ill, I felt shattered and anxious for my family. A friend who deliberately did wrong even after I had counseled her drove me to frustration. Even rain clouds blocking an otherwise beautiful sunrise in Tagaytay almost ruined my day. Simply put, I just can’t handle not being in control very well.
But the undeniable truth is, I need not be in total control because Someone already is. Like most of us, I had to learn this the hard way.
So I have resolved to avoid seeking full control. As in driving, I need to give the steering wheel to a better driver and take the passenger’s seat. After all, the view is better from there.
What things do you need to let go and let God take control of?